Mommy Pigg

You really just have to roll with it when you fall madly in love with a man whose last name is Pigg. Ten years of marriage later, hubby and the kiddos (which I refer to as ‘my people’) get a real kick out of calling me Mommy Pigg. So here I am in all my Mommy Pigg glory.

How did I get here? You know that girl with whole heart? We were freshman year college roommates! Oh girl, how did we get here? I am crazy honored that she asked me to blog for you all!

The journey: After college I got married, became a school counselor, and had three sweet boys. My life journey thus far has included many seasons; joy, sorrow, relief, longing, calmness, and wild. We walked alongside my sister-in-law through a 20 month battle with cancer that ended with her joyously meeting our Lord. We lost a baby to miscarriage but had three healthy boys. We made two major moves and started over with friendships, churches, and jobs. I talk a lot about seasons and believe that they are a huge part of our lives.

The here and now: So in this season every day looks just about the same; I stay at home with my three boys, ages 5, 2, and 6 months! I work hard to take care of my family, feed them well (hear me saying ‘feed them enough’ because they are human garbage disposals), honor God, and spread joy around me. The boys take an incredible amount of brain power (and some days there just isn’t enough) but I long to raise men of character.

My passions: Let me just say that I am passionate about my husband; this man is so wonderful! He and I began a mission in January to simplify our life and create space to enjoy it while serving others. I love to be active, be on the go, and take my people with me! We are trying to figure out how to be better versions of ourselves both individually and as a couple. As much as I hate to admit it, I am a little behind the times on the clean and organic movements. So we can walk the journey together as I become a healthier and more thoughtful consumer.

Moving forward: Yes! Let’s walk this life journey together through the crazy seasons and celebrate the highs, stick together in the lows, and laugh through it all! For me, laughter is key. Why, you ask?

Because my people call me Mommy Pigg.

Steph

How to Raise a Kid with a Personality

You know the kid. That kid who wears a suit or a tutu to school just because. The kid that creates weird, almost inedible sandwiches with every item on his plate with gusto and enthusiasm. The kid that wants to give his teacher a plastic unicorn head for the end of the year gift? The kid that acts like a dancing monkey to make the special neds student in the class smile. I love this kid! I love the kid with serious personality and charisma that doesn’t take themselves too seriously and says what they wanna say and does what they wanna do. 

So, as parents, how do you raise this kid? How do you raise a kid with personality, character, and heart?

I’ve given this topic alot of thought because I’ve known alot of kids in my day. I’ve known the kids with personality for days and I’ve known kids with the personality of a stack of bricks. Truth be told, I worry about the kids with little, or no, personality. How will they ever succeed? Who hires the boring person lacking charisma? I want to raise a kid with personality for days; the kind of person people can’t wait to see and love being around.

Step 1: Model

If you want a kid with personality, you have to find your personality, too. Don’t transform from super cool rocker chick into frumpy soccer mom overnight just because you have a kid if that’s not who you are. In my opinion, a mom is somebody that mothers kids and there’s no right or wrong way for a mom to eat, sleep, drink, or dress. So, first and foremost, be true to yourself and let your own personality shine. How will your kid learn to be true to themselves if everyone around them is fake?

Family flour fight

Step 2: Do Weird Things

My dad worked long hours when I was a kid, but he didn’t want to miss out on taking me and my sisters to the park. So, he’d often come home around 10 or 11 at night (on school nights), wake us up and take us to the park to play in our PJs. Do you think he ever cared what anyone else thought about this? Nope. He valued playing with us more than anything else. We dressed up as Donald, Daisy, Hewy, Dewy, and Louie one year for Halloween and a box of Raisin Bran the next (literally). We hunted craydads in the muddy gullies of Houston when it rained, we had food fights often in the kitchen, and we slept in our car a few times while traveling Europe to save on expenses. Adventure was more important than comfort : )

Step 3: Value Personality in Others

We watched movies and TV shows featuring people with a lot of personality and character. My dad usually shared his feelings about these strong personalities aloud too, “Wow, that girl sure is alot of fun” or “I love a women who seeks adventure”. Hearing these things taught me to evaluate people based on character, but also personality. I grew up wanting to be someone with personality and character because that’s where value was placed.

Step 4: Don’t Take Yourself Too Seriously

My dad is infamous for his “Rick-diculous” dancing, costumes, and pranks. For example, he decided to squirt my mom down with ketchup and mustard just for fun on one of their first dates. I think he was testing her to be sure she didn’t take herself too seriously. It was a match made in heaven! In fact, below is a picture of my prankster husband smashing my mom’s face in cake Christmas night. Just because.

When my little sister was a kid and got a round brush stuck in her hair, my dad made her go to the movies with the family and wait to get it untangled later. The image of the brush’s silhouette sticking out the side of her head in the theater will always make me laugh out loud.

Step 5: Let Them Be Them

This one is crucial. Don’t falsely inflate their self-esteem with “Wow, you’re so great” when they really didn’t do anything great, but focus your energy and enthusiasm on the things about them that really are great. When they say something funny, laugh! When they ask a question, don’t be so quick to answer and explain something to them, but get their thoughts instead. Trust me, hearing their thoughts is often film-worthy! Let them try things you know they’re going to fail at and praise the effort, not the product. Allow them to explore, seek adventure, and get dirty. Don’t shame them when they make mistakes, but encourage the initiative and creativity.

She’s mid yawn, lol

Laugh! Create! Sing! Dance! Play! Explore! Live your life with passion and be compassionate!

Inspire them to do things differently, try something new, wear something weird, ask stupid questions, paint with all the colors, mix the play-doh of life!

The most successful people in the world are the ones that did something different!

Tell us about your kids. What’s their personality like?

Love, That Girl

Parenting Myths Debunked

One of the hardest things about being a parenting specialist without any kids is having to keep my mouth shut when parents fall for common parenting myths as societal norms. Well, I’m here to debunk those myths. Cause…

First, let me toot my horn on what makes me an expert since I don’t reference my sources cause I don’t always know how I know this shit, I just do! Deal with it, lol.

• BS Child Development from University of North Texas 
• MA Professional Counseling, Play Therapy
• LPC-Intern, licensed by the state of Texas
• Approved facilitator of “Parenting the Love & Logic Way”
• Happiest Baby on the Block educator

Myth #1: If you hold a baby too much, you will spoil it.

TRUTH: Studies show that babies from attachment parents, or parents who respond immediately to baby’s cues, are more confident, more secure, less ependent, more social, and do better in school.

So, mom, feel free to hold that baby for 9 months, love it, kiss it, hug it, play with it, and wear it!

Myth #2: It’s normal not to get any sleep for the first year.

TRUTH: Most babies will start sleeping “through the night”, which means a 5-6 hour stretch at about 8-10 weeks. By 5 months at the latest they should be going all night without a feed. Build heathy sleep habits by keeping them swaddled tight, on their backs, NOTHING in the crib, lights off, and white noise machine on. Change, feed, burp, lay down, leave the room.

Myth #3: Not being able to shop without chasing a toddler around the store is just part of parenting.

TRUTH: If you wear the child as a baby at the store and put them in the cart seat as a toddler, they will not have the option of running around. This will give you time to teach that the store is not for running in. Now, once kid is too big for the seat, they will likely instigate a game of chase once or twice and I can’t help you there unless you want some Love & Logic tips, lol.

Myth #4: Baby’s first food should be rice cereal.

TRUTH: Rice cereal has no nutritive value, it’s been known to cause allergic reactions, upset stomachs, constipation, and poor eating. Breastmilk is all baby needs for the first year, but if you want to introduce table foods around 6-8 months, start with pureed root veggies, then non-acidic fruits. Intro one new food every three days to test for reactions.

Myth #5: A carrier can serve as transport to and from the car and it can be my highchair/booster seat.

TRUTH: Carseats are designed to be carseats only. It is NOT recommended that baby be in the chin-to-chest position for longer than 2 hours at a stretch.

Myth #6: It’s important to issue a consequence for my child’s behavior immediately.

TRUTH: It’s important to RESPOND imediately, but there’s no need to issue a consequence right away. Give yourself time to think it through and deliver it calmly and lovingly. “Oh, that behavior makes me so sad. I’m going to have to do something about that”. Then, take your time and think it through before delivering.

Myth #7: My child only likes chicken strips, mac and cheese, and goldfish.

TRUTH: When children are only offered healthy foods, they only eat healthy foods. Yes, they may be picky at first, but continue introducing the items and overtime they will eat them. America is THE only country that complains of picky eaters and has a 5 item kid’s menu at every restaurant. In fact, in France, the kids order off the adult menu and just get a smaller portion. Are kids just not picky in 95% of the world or is it possible we need a lil’ self-reflection?

Whew! Glad I got that out there. 

What parenting myth do you need debunked?

Three Fold: Why ‘Sposies Suck

My husband’s grandmother had seven kids AND raised my husband. That’s 8 kids in cloth diapers during the 60s and 70s. Sound exhausting? I can’t help but be over the moon excited that cloth diapers have come a LONG way since then! No more folding, safety pinning, hanging dry on a clothesline, or wearing rubber pants.

Cloth diapers are chic, adorbs, and the reasons for choosing them over ‘sposies are three fold!

1. TOXINS

Disposable diapers contain sodium polyacralate, bleach (dioxin), chlorine, tributyl-tin (TBT), and other carcinogens that are banned all over the world.

Do NOT underestimate the ability of the skin to absorb these chemicals into the bloodstream. Our skin is not only our largest organ, but it’s also very porous and sucks up all it comes in contact with.

Sodium polyacralate was BANNED in the 80s for causing Toxic Shock Syndrome via tampons, but it’s still in our diapers?!

TBT has been scientifically proven to cause hormonal problems in humans and animals. Seen a rise in infertility in 80s babies? What about a rise in ADHD? Depression? Early onset of puberty in teens? We found the culprit!

Dioxin has been reported by the EPA as the most toxic of all the chemicals linked to cancer. Did you know that childhood cancer has risen over 25% in the last ten years? It keeps climbing and our toxins are to blame.

Ever seen a cloth diaper break open exposing it’s “crystals”? News flash! Those are TOXIC. That’s what babies are sitting in 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for the first 2.5 to 3 years of their life and it’s being absorbed into their little bodies!

2. ENVIRONMENT

The average baby goes through 9,000 diapers, more than 2 tons of diapers before they’re potty trained, and 92% of those diapers end up in a landfill and won’t decompose for an estimated 300-500 years. So, see ya later, Mother Earth. It’s been nice knowin’ ya!

Photo credit: mabubaby.com

Ever read the back of a box of diapers? It actually says you’re supposed to dump the poop out of disposables because our landfills and trash systems are not designed to deal with human feces! Think of the germs, diseases, and even live viruses from childhood vaccines, that get expelled from baby via poop. 9,000 lbs of that ends up in the landfills where flies, bugs, and birds carry it around our world? GROSS!

Plus, think of the wasted resources! Plastics, cotton, and trees (1/4 of a million trees per year for ‘sposies just in pulp) are wasted…literally thrown away for the billions of diapers we consume.

3. COSTS

It’s estimated that parents will spend anywhere from $2500-4000 on diapers and wipes on each child before they’re potty trained. For two kids in ‘sposies, you’ll spend $5000-8000, and up to almost $12,000 by the third kid!

With cloth diapers, not only can you buy a starter kit of 24 diapers for less than $600 that will last you from newborn through potty training, but you can use the same set of diapers across kids! No worrying about buying the right size for each kid, always packing extra, or running out in the middle of the night. One size (OS) cloth diapers are all you need!

Moms who made the switch from ‘sposies to cloth say:

• Less leaks and explosions with cloth diapers
• Easy to use and launder
• Major financial relief
• They’re so much cuter
• We never worry about their health

What’s holding you back from making the switch?

Shop for your starter kit HERE

Breasts are Cheaper!

Breasts are cheaper? Gotcha, pervert. I’m not talking about implants here, I’m talking about breastfeeding vs. bottle feeding. I LOVE to break down costs in regards to the hot button issues the “sanctimommies” bring up because, let’s face it…money is important to all of us. 

First, let’s just say baby eats an average of 25 ounces of milk/formula a day. They eat way less than that early on and way more than that later in their first year, but on average, 25 ounces per day. Formula costs an average of 20 cents per ounce, which means baby eats on roughly $5 a day. Shoot, I wish everyone in my family ate on $5 a day. But, this equates to $1825 a year.

This is assuming baby is strictly formula fed; however, most babies will eat purees and solids around 6-8 months and be substituted with formula. So, $1500-2000 is a safe guestimate. Add in bottles, nipples, cleaners, drying rack, bottle warmer, and bottle brush for a total around $150-200 (or more).

Breastfeeding costs $0 if you breastfeed exclusively; however, if you do need to pump, a breastpump will cost between $200-300, which is still a huge savings.

Many breastfeeding moms opt for a few luxury items to make nursing more comfortable so let’s add in nipple pads, nursing bras, fenugreek, blessed thistle and a nursing pillow.

Nipple pads: $7-15

+Nursing bras: $30-40

+Fenugreek & blessed thistle: $30

+Nursing pillow: $60

=Roughly $100-145 total with all the luxury items.

Wow! That means you can save $1000 up to $2000 by breastfeeding your baby! Plus, a breastfed baby doesn’t even need purees or solids. In fact, lactation consultants and baby food preppers recommend solids as “dessert”, given only AFTER a successful breastfeeding session. This prevents nipple confusion and helps maintain a healthy nursing relationship.

Increase milk supply by eating healthily, drinking TONS of water, taking herbal supplements as mentioned above and encapsulating your placenta. Aim to nurse for as long as you can, at least the first year, but be kind to yourself if you don’t make it : )

How long did you nurse your baby?

I’m Not a Perfect Mom, and It’s Driving Me Insane!

I’m not perfect. Yes, I said it. I am a mother, and I’m not perfect. I can admit to my failure all day long, but honestly, the guilt I feel every day is an emotion so overwhelming I physically ache and I’m going crazy trying to be the perfect mother.

If you are a mom you’ve experienced mommy guilt in some form or fashion.

Most things I feel guilty about are small issues that may seem silly, but I seriously beat myself up over every possible thing I may be doing wrong.

It started from the moment I discovered I was pregnant…

I shouldn’t have eaten all those sweets today. I’m not resting enough. I’m resting too much and I’m not active enough. I’m not eating enough fruit for the baby’s health. I’m too tired to spend a lot of time playing with my other children.

To giving birth and having a baby…

I should’ve done a natural birth with no drugs. I shouldn’t have sent the baby to the nursery so soon. I shouldn’t have stopped breastfeeding so early. I’m not holding the baby enough. I’m holding the baby too much. I should’ve waited to go back to work until the baby was a little older. I should have been a stay at home mom.

To toddlerhood… I shouldn’t have let her play on the iPad before bed. I should have bought organic fruit. I should have woke up earlier so I wouldn’t have had to curb their appetites by giving them a Poptart in the car. I should have cuddled them more before bed. I should’ve picked them up from daycare earlier. I should be taking more pictures. Should she really be eating donuts for breakfast?

The list goes on and on and on and on. My oldest daughter also has severe eczema and I could go on for days about the guilt I feel over not finding a treatment that has resolved her constant red and itchy skin (but that’s a story for another day).

A few days ago I broke down in tears to my husband after my three year old tried to swing from the cord to her blinds during her nap time and the cord ripped into her fingers and cut her skin. I blamed myself for not being attentive enough to hear her playing, having a safety latch on the cord, and not being able to take her pain away.

My husband reminded me that my kids are going to get hurt, because they are kids, and that’s not always my fault. He also reminded me that I am not a failure as a mother because I truly care, and worrying about every little thing was getting me nowhere.

He was right. I was beating myself up everyday, and while I’m not perfect I do show up for my kids every day. I make sure they are fed, have lunches for school, they are clothed and their laundry is clean, they are bathed, read to, listened to, and most importantly, they feel loved.

I sat down and thought about some ways that I am going to try and overcome my mommy guilt, because lets be honest, if this doesn’t stop I will be ripping my hair out by the time the girls are teenagers.

Here are some quick tips I am going to use to help cope with my mom guilt…

1. Research and Decide What’s Best

If someone tells me gluten-free stopped their child’s tantrums, or organic foods and natural oils should be the only thing I’m buying or using for my children, I’m going to do my research and find out what’s best for my kids, and I am going to stick with that. I’m not going to continue feeling guilty because I’m not using cloth diapers or medicating with homeopathic remedies if that’s not what I feel works best for my children and my family.

2. Reflect and Respond

Everyday when I pick them up from daycare I ask my children what the best part of their day was, because if I say, “How was your day?” they usually respond with , “Good, but…” and proceed with something negative that happened. Just as I want them to focus on the positives, I am going to do the same for myself. I am going to reflect on all of the things I AM doing well, and if there is something I find I truly should feel guilty about, then I will fix it.

3. Play with My Kids

Instead of distancing myself from my children when I am feeling guilty, I get closer to them. I read them stories, play a game, or build a fort. I have meaningful conversations with them, and it always makes me realize that no matter how imperfect I am, they are happy and healthy and feel loved and that’s all that really matters!

4. Have Some Me Time

Sometimes it’s okay to take a break from the kids. There are days where I need some mommy time where I can focus on pampering myself. If I am in a negative mood or I am feeling down, those emotions trickle down to my little ones. Getting away from the stress of motherhood and stepping back to look at all of my blessings helps me not only destress but also keeps me sane. A happy and healthy mommy, makes for a happy and healthy family.

5. Let It Go

I am going to take some advice from my girls favorite Disney character Elsa, and “Let it Go”. Oddly enough, this song spoke to me and actually made me tear up the first time I heard it. If you listen to the lyrics carefully, I think it speaks to mothers everywhere who experience mommy guilt and like me, feel that we as mothers have to be perfect. Let it go, and know that even though you aren’t perfect, your children still see you as their hero.

“Don’t let them in, don’t let them see, Be the good girl you always have to be. Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know, well now they know! Let it go, let it go That perfect girl is gone!”

What are some things that make you feel mommy guilt? What are some strategies you use to deal with mommy guilt?

How to Maintain Your Sense of Self

As we get older we add more hats to our head. Growing up you might have just been daughter, friend, sister, but now you may be daughter, friend, sister, aunt, wife, career chick, mom, stepmom, chaufer, chef, launderer, maid, etc. So, moms, I ask you, how do you maintain your sense of self as a woman?

This is something I began struggling with when I got married. I instantly felt an enormous pressure to be this whole other person…a wife. Even though my husband and I had been together for nearly eight years something had changed. I could no longer think only of myself.

Then, I started going through infertility treatments and became so self-involved that I forgot about my husband and everyone else. In a way, you have to be self-involved to be successful because everything you do, eat, and drink plays a factor in your fertility.

But, the question remains- How do you maintain your sense of self?

First, ask yourself these questions:

• Who are the most important people in my life?
• What gives me joy?
• When do I feel the most energized?
• What makes me feel good about myself?
• How do I want people to describe me?
• Where do I want to be in 5 years? 10 years?
• Who do I want to be in 5 years? 10 years?

Think carefully about the answers to these questions and WRITE them down. If you want to go the extra mile, create a collage of images that answer these questions.

Then, create an action plan related to these answers. For example, sending a card to the people you care about or clling them and setting a date to catch up. Schedule a time to do the things that give you joy every day, week or month, depending on how reasonable that would be. Make an effort to do the things that energize you more. Research people you admire and find out how they go to where they are and decide what you can change about your life to become who you want to be again.

Me with my role model, Carrie Contey, PhD

Every Sunday night I look at my calendar for the week and I schedule:

• Time to shop for, and prepare clean, energizing meals
• Time for a run around the lake, zumba, and hot yoga
• An evening date or happy hour with a girlfriend or group of friends
• A meal or two with just my husband
• An afternoon by the pool reading and relaxing

Bonus: if I can fit in a glass of wine or a bubble bath, I’ll add that, too!

This is often easier said than done, but there was a time when I allowed my want for a baby to become the only focus in my life and I don’t want to do that again. When all your energy is focused outside yourself its easy to lose yourself. As a mother, it’s easy for you to focus only on your to-do list, potty training, appointments, bills, what’s for dinner, etc. But, it’s not good for you or your child for you to lose who you are.

How do you maintain your sense of self?

Making time to enjoy the beauty of nature with Cloudy

Who is that Kelli girl?

Did you catch the viral video set to Uptown Funk motivating kids getting ready to take the STAAR test? That was my dear friend, Kelli Hauser! She’s a dynamite chick living life with a whole heart; raising a family, inspiring young minds, and being true to herself. That Girl, Kelli, has joined the Whole Heart team. Check her out…

In order to understand the voice behind a blog I think it’s important to understand the person behind the computer. Here is a little about me and why I have chosen to begin the blogging experience.

I was born and raised in the once small town of Burleson, Texas. Yes, the home of the first American Idol winner Kelly Clarkson. I grew up with loving parents, went to church every Sunday, and was blessed to have a younger brother and sister to keep me entertained.

I went to college at the University of North Texas in Denton, about an hour from where I grew up. Far enough to get away, but still close enough to go home when I needed my momma. I met my amazing husband my senior year of college. He and I connected from the moment we first met. We both loved music (he plays guitar and I sing), and we began playing music and performing together and quickly fell in love. Within a year we were engaged and and six months after that we were married! We both became teachers after graduating from UNT, and stayed in Denton.

Two years later, I was diagnosed with PCOS and endometriosis. I had to have surgery and with only one ovary left my doctor told my husband and I that if we wanted to have children we had better start trying. Fearful we wouldn’t get pregnant we began the journey of trying to conceive and after four months, I was pregnant with our first baby girl, Kinley. Our little miracle was born happy and healthy in May of 2011, and when she was only four months old, despite all odds, we found out we were pregnant again! We had our second baby girl, Khloe, in June of 2012, only a year and month apart from our first. Needless to say I was thrilled but also overwhelemed!

The summer after I had Khloe my body began to turn against me. I began getting ill on a constant basis, had skin problems, and my hair began to fall out. My skin would get hives, my eyes were red, burned all the time and were light sensitive. For weeks doctors battled to calm down what I learned to be vasculitis of the eyes and skin. After many tests, doctors confirmed I had systemic lupus, an autoimmune disease. I was absolutely devastated. My family, career, and health had finally seemed to be on track and I was so scared about how this disease would affect my life. My doctor has me on meds for my lupus and I have good and bad days.

I currently teach 6th grade reading at a middle school in Denton, Texas. I am a cheerleading coach as well. I am pursuing my masters degree in School Counseling. My husband is an assistant principal at at high school in Denton, and my little girls are now 2 and 3.

A lot of my posts will be about living with an invisible illness and still trying to be a good wife, daughter, mother and teacher. I have a lot to say as well about teaching, marriage and motherhood to anyone that will listen.

xoxo That Kelli Girl

What are some things you’d like to know about me? What would you like to hear me discuss in my blogs?

I Want My Kids to Get Hurt

Hold up…before anybody gets up in a tizzy and reports me to the authorities for my title, hear me out. 

When I was about 7 years old I stubbed my toe on our driveway and knocked about 1/8 of an inch off the top. No, it wasn’t a scratch or a stubbed toe; I’m talking O-F-F,  toe hanging by a thread.

When I was 8 or 9 I floated the river with my family and got separated from the group. They went right and I went left. I flipped out of my tube and was stuck in the undercurrent of the rapid for what felt like an eternity until a nice man put down his oar and pulled me out.

When I was 10 I let a friend talk me into “pumping” on her bike, which means you stand on the front or back pegs that stick out of the wheels while they drive they bike. Of course she wrecked while I was on the back and the wheels (very hot I might add), burned into the sides of my calf muscles. I still have scars.

In sixth grade I rode my bike down on hill behind our house in England and passed out on the bike due to fear, heat, and the rocky path and I slammed into the wooden fence of the neighborhood pub, flipped over the bike and landed in a thorn bush. Climbing out of the bush once I came to caused even more scratches.

In 8th grade I packed only my cutest outfits to youth retreats and was usually freezing my ass off every night, miserable, and getting sick.

My sophomore year I attempted to dive off my friend’s decorative waterfall in the backyard pool and the rocks broke, sending me sliding rump first down the rocks and causing a bruise the size of the infamous one in “A League of their Own”.

I’ve been on bad dates, gotten food poisoning, been in horrendous car wrecks, fallen down stairs, bumped into walls, sprained ankles, and had close encounters with the death far more than I want to admit. But, the fact is- I’ve learned something from every mistake. People don’t learn from being told; they learn from experience.

• I wear shoes when I’m outside and I NEVER run barefoot unless I’m on a beach.
• I always hold someone’s foot or hand when approaching rapids and wear a lifevest whenever I’m in dangerous territory.
• I never stood on the front of anyone’s bike again and in fact, I learned in adolesence that me and bikes don’t mix- period.
• I always check the weather when I’m traveling anywhere and I pack for all possible scenarios. I’ve learned to agree with my dad that, “Warm is beautiful”.
• I don’t dive, EVER. ‘Nuff said. I suck at diving.

I’ve got stories to tell and I’ve learned to try new things, be adventurous, how to protect myself, and not be afraid. If you fall, you’ll get back up. If you get sick, you’ll heal. If you fail, try it differently next time.

I don’t want to be one of those parents who follows their kids around so scared that something bad will happen. I don’t want to send my kids the message that without me they can’t survive or figure things out. How will they learn to wear a coat if they’ve never been cold? Why would they eat a decent meal if I’ve always got snacks? Why pack their homework when they know I’ll bring it to them? How will they know what it feels like to get up if I never let them fall?

How can we expect them to take initiative if we’ve always told them where to go, what to do, what to watch out for, and what to be afraid of? How many times do you say, “be careful” to your child a day? I don’t want my kids to “be careful”! I want them to grab life by the horns and go for it! (within reason, lol)

The point is- we have to let our kids get hurt from time to time. Let them struggle. Let them fall. A stubbed toe, exposure to germs, or a broken limb are part of childhood.

A parent who always remembers, has a child who always forgets.

Whole Hearted Love

I’ve been in Siloam Springs, Arkansas this past week waiting on the arrival of my nephew, Zade. My sister has an eighteen month old and a full-time job so this has been a great opportunity for me to spend some quality time with my niece, Evelyn. At eighteen months old this little girl demonstrates love with a “whole heart”. 

It’s inspiring the way that she loves!

I love watching her playing on her own, perfectly content, and then suddenly getting this overwhelming urge to kiss somebody. She’ll jump up and run across the room and give a huge, open-mouthed kiss to whoever is willing, lol. When she was a baby she would “eat” our faces, covering us with wet, slobbery love!

We took her to the local library on Saturday morning to sing songs and see Santa. She started the visit by sitting in her mom’s lap during the first songs, but then sat in my mother’s lap, whom she calls “Captain”. Then, she moved over into my lap for a song or two and then on to her other grandmother’s lap. It was as if she knew we each wanted a piece of her love and she had no problems sharing it.

I love when she’s sitting next to you or being held and she suddenly screams and grabs your face with both hands to pull you in for a hug. Or, when she runs full force across the living room to wrap her hands around you.

Yesterday at Target she saw a mentally disabled woman and she smiled and waved at her and chased after her momentarily just to say, “Hi”. When she sees my dog she pats her head gently or strokes her paws and smiles at her. She has a babydoll in a cradle that she kisses or pats whenever she walks by. She LOVES!

She loves with her whole heart!

The question is: Did she learn this from those around her being so loving to one another? OR is this just her personality?

Or even better…

“Are ALL children born filled with love?”

If so, when is it lost? When do children lose that overwhelming urge to hug, kiss, touch, and smile at those around them? When do they become scared to show affection? When do we become so hurt and jaded that we can’t grab a friend and kiss them when we feel love towards them? When do we begin to fear looking vulnerable by showing love?

Hmmmmm…..